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Have I Offended?

June 16, 2008

Apparently I have done something terribly wrong and upset God and the delicate balance of the universe.  It could just be a run of bad luck but it’s highly unlikely, I am sure I squashed an ant or something – or maybe it was that bird’s nest we moved in May.  Displacing the home of one of God’s creatures is surly not a desirable decision.  Anyway, it all started last Thursday.

I qualified for this market research study on snacks a few months ago.  It’s a really cool gig, you get paid a nice sum ($85 in this case) to sit around and give your opinion.  I was supposed to go in on Thursday the 17th at 4:00 for the actual research part.  Only, if you are a math genius or you have a calendar you would know that this past Thursday was not the 17th and furthermore that the 17th doesn’t fall on a Thursday but rather this Tuesday.  So, strike one for me and my karma.

Sunday, national laundry day, I decide to throw in the placemats from last night’s dinner with our light colors and whites.  After all, I have washed them plenty of times and they are only a light tan color, not red or bright blue.  For all you color geniuses out there what do you get when you mix white and light brown – why nothing other than a creamy yellow, most closely resembling pit stains.  And no color on earth could be less appealing than pit stain yellow, other than skid mark brown I guess.

After my shocking, alarming and most annoying discovery I do the next logical thing.  I scream and yell at Chad, fighting back tears over my ruined tank tops, t-shirts and brand new white Capri pants.  Oh yeah, and some of his boy stuff too.  I scramble for some way to make this his fault, unfortunately he has a fail proof story – as in, he didn’t start the laundry or even divide the laundry.  He wasn’t even near the laundry.   It was ALL MY FAULT.  For a staunch perfectionist who hates stains and anything being dirty this was detrimental to my day, if not week.

 I spend the rest of day soaking in bleach, washing and rewashing – not myself but the clothing.  But to no avail, all of Chad’s new socks and underwear are still pit stain yellow and my beautiful white Capri pants are the same.  However, you will be glad to know that Chad’s old Mesquite Community College t-shirt with a giant hole in the armpit is good to go, along with his stretched out vintage Madden t-shirt that he mowed the lawn in that weekend.  Seriously, what did I do!

I cap off the weekend burning my hand on a pan fresh out of the oven (duh) and falling asleep with a big fat headache –while the dog strategically inches me off the bed to expand his kingdom in the middle.

 

P.S. I woke up at 4:00 AM unable to really go back to sleep, I had a dream about falling asleep in the mall and getting beat up by a gang of Brazilian hooligans (it could happen).

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. June 17, 2008 3:57 am

    Hmmm..I find way too often that I have weeks like this as well!
    Love the blog! You are a fantastic writer! 🙂

  2. June 17, 2008 10:36 am

    Awww. Today will be better.

  3. June 17, 2008 1:02 pm

    BOO!!! I’m sorry 😦 Can you bleach some of the white stuff?

  4. Cindy Oates permalink
    June 20, 2008 8:15 pm

    Heahter, she TRIED the bleach! Try to be more thorough in your reading, please. Gah!

  5. Cindy Oates permalink
    June 20, 2008 8:16 pm

    Okay, so I’ll try to be more thorough in my typing, H-e-a-t-h-e-r. sorry

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