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Love and Marriage

June 18, 2008

Marriage is a truly enlightening experience.  Not only do you get to know that specific person quite well but you also get an up close and personal glimpse of the opposite sex in general.  In just under a year I have made some amazing observations so I thought it only right to share them with you.  OH, and just so there is no confusion not all of these observations were gathered from my husband in particular.

1.      Huffing around and giving the silent treatment is not a method of communication that men pick up on – it’s best to be direct or else you (the woman) ends up miserable while they (the man) exists blissfully unaware.

2.     Men CAN multitask, despite common belief that only women can. I have seen Chad on the computer, texting, watching a live game on one TV, fast forwarding a recorded game on the other TV all the while listening to the story I was telling…and eating Runts.

3.     Men have hobbies that almost always involve a competitive element – video games, fantasy leagues, golf, etc.  Women don’t need competitive hobbies like these as we prefer stealth like levels of competition executed by having the tiniest waist lines, most expensive purses, cutest hair cut, and so on.

4.     Women DO consider having dinner with friends a hobby, men consider it borderline homosexual…unless there is a sporting event on and beer is involved, a meal may be eaten as long as it is eaten at a bar (not a table).  It is preferable that meals and/or drinks be served by a female in a tight shirt, shiny orange shorts and ugly white high top sneakers – minus ten points for a college education (this is definitely an observation NOT from my husband, seriously).

5.     Men cycle through the same 5 t-shirts every week – for however long it takes those shirts to disintegrate.  Women can wear a shirt once, decide it’s old 2 months later, never wear it again, but keep it for 8 years (just in case).

6.     Bruce Willis does not make romantic comedies – that’s the last time I fall for that!

7.     Patrick Dempsy and Matthew M. don’t make action thrillers either – teehee, my revenge.

8.     Men care that their car is clean, women (or at least the ones I know) don’t particularly fret over it too much.

9.     Women care that the baseboards, microwave, and burner plates are clean, men (at least the ones I know) don’t particularly fret over them too much.

10.                        I am a very lucky woman to have the man that I have!

3 Comments leave one →
  1. June 20, 2008 3:48 pm

    We are lucky we are so different!

  2. Cindy Oates permalink
    June 20, 2008 8:12 pm

    That Tom…..soooooo much insight!

  3. June 21, 2008 12:16 am

    I’m gonna have to argue with that guys = clean cars theory. Brian could survive in the wild for at least three months with all of the crap piled in his ride.

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