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Our Delicate Flour

December 23, 2008

Friday afternoon was our annual Christmas lunch.  Chad did his husbandly duties (no not those) by attending and afterwards we headed home (in separate vehicles) where we planned to change and head to the mall for our annual shopping trip together.  Well, of course shopping is more like a biweekly experience for me but Chad literally only shops once a year.  No really, it’s true.  Anyway, he arrived home before I did, probably because I consider the posted speed limit more than just a suggestion from the state of Texas.  Upon my arrival I noticed that something was amuck in the kitchen, “Chad, Chad?”  No reply, so I shout again, “I’m on the phone!” he replies loudly from him man room/loan office.  Ok, so I notice that my fancy schmancy Lazy Suzan/Spice racks shelf is turned open.  Hmmm, I doubt Chad did any cooking in his 20 minutes alone, nor would he know where I kept the sugar and cooking spray anyway.  Then I spotted my bag of flour, ripped open from top to bottom.  Definitely not the handy work of my kitchenly challenged husband, no, this reeked more of our four legged roommate (whose last rent check bounced,  who never contributes to the grocery bill, refuses to do laundry and insists of shedding on every surface – while protesting by barking loudly at the vacuum when it’s time to clean).  Yep, the dog had pushed open the spice shelf, ripped open the flour only to discovered that flour has no taste.  But he was there just long enough to make a mess on the floor and as we would soon discover a nice white fur paste. 

For those of you inexperienced with flour, think paper mache, glue, and all things sticky and gooey.  So yeah, Chewy STILL has some white spots of gunk in his fur…until we get a chance to chase him down, corner him and force wash him.  But here is the amazing part of it all…..Chad had no clue.  He walked in, passed through the kitchen and the whole scene went unnoticed.  I am still in awe of men’s ability to block out things on the peripheral.  That’s probably why they can focus so well on work and other important things like Call of Duty Eight and Fantasy Football.


GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN INNOCENT (which has yet to happen).

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